Something More...

What Makes You Feel Good About Who You Are?

Dionna Sanchez — 2009-06-13T16:53:58 -05.00

When do you truly feel as if you've "come into your own." In what atmosphere, setting, or moment in time have you felt like you were the person you truly wanted to be? What makes you feel good about being YOU?

So many women don't feel good about themselves. You can see it in their faces. Maybe they believe lies that were told to them when they were young. Maybe no one has encouraged them or told them they were valuable in a really long time. Or maybe they are just trying to be something...someone that they simply were not created or destined to be!

I'm still in the process of "coming into my own." But the more I am able to truly know who I am, what I feel, and what embodies or makes me "me" - the freer I feel in my own skin. The more relaxed I am able to be and the more I seek to learn about myself, because I have found that I am a very intricate person!

For me, I have found that I will never be okay with who I am when I am seeking things outside of God's love, plans, and messages that are aimed just for my personal heart and soul. The more I desire to be closer to Him, the more I embrace the truth that He loves me "just as I am" - then those are the moments where I can enjoy life the most and live it with the most abandon, because then, I can forget myself in the process. And I believe that is how God truly wants us to live.

It's time we stop putting so many unnecessary demands on our shoulders, stop trying to meet expectations placed on us by others, and instead start discovering what our true calling in life as a woman and an individual is ....

.... it's the only way we will ever truly feel free in being just the person that God created us to be.

Accept Where We Are

Dionna Sanchez — 2009-05-29T11:47:25 -05.00

I was listening to an online speaker this morning. He was talking about health and our bodies and how so many of us deal with one malady or another - but we fail to go before the Lord and accept the gift of the body He has given us! He mentioned that many of us are satisfied with what we've got, until we see what someone else has. Whether that is better health, a better marriage or whatever - when we take our eyes off the path that God has us on - that is when we grow dissatisfied.

This is so true in so many areas of our lives. We all go through things in life. No one gets out of this world without enduring something or another. For everyone, that challenge could be different. For some of us, it is health issues - whether cancer, constant allergies, battles with depression, kidney stones, eye problems, weight issues, arthritis, heart problems, diabetes, or recurring infections. For others, it could be dealing with critical family members, a broken family due to divorce, sexual addictions, anger, a low self esteem, strong willed children, prodigal children, financial problems, or any number of addictions, persecutions, emotional issues, or spiritual battles.

The constant struggle of dealing with whatever issue we have been dealt - can be draining and wearing. We can "rail" against God and ask Him, 'Why me?"

We've all done it. We've all felt it. We could also just accept it.

Accepting the hurtful, HARD stuff in our lives is not an easy thing to do. If we accept it, we are aknowledging that whatever we are dealing with may always be in our lives. And most of us just don't like that option - do we?

But we could look at the flip side of accepting what life has dealt us. Maybe - just maybe - God will use it to chisel the bad stuff out of us and mold and shape us to be more like Him. Maybe what we go through will be used to bring others to His kingdom.

If we can ask God to help us adjust our attitudes to what we are experiencing, I think we will find our outlook (and possibly our situation, as a result) will improve.

There are no mistakes. Do you believe that? That what happens in your life is not by happenstance? God allows certain things to happen in our lives for a reason - just as Satan hits us in our lives in certain areas for a reason. It's time we start accepting where we are at so that we can move forward. It's time that we get on our knees before God, being honest with him about the pain this certain area or struggle has brought to our heart and life... so that we can then, humbly ask Him to give us the strength and courage to deal with it in a way that will bring glory to Him.

There are so many hurting people out there. People are struggling with so many different things and are remaining victims of those hurdles in their lives. But we can praise God knowing that He is sovereign and all -knowing and that He WILL bring all things together for good if we serve Him and remain faithful to Him. If our life remains a life filled with issues, and struggles - so be it! Our attitude and acceptance of it, can dramatically transform how we feel about our obstacle or battle, as we go through it. Thus, possibly easing the weight or burden of it on our lives.

God loves you and I. He hears our cries and sees our tears. Yet He also seeks our trust. Let's give it to Him as we seek His guidance to help us learn to accept what we've been given, and where we are. Let's lean on Him for our courage and strength as we strive to move beyond it - never letting it overcome who we are meant to be in Him.

Just As I Am

Dionna Sanchez — 2009-05-15T14:52:47 -05.00

Have you ever had one of those days when you just felt like a dork? Efforts made - came up short. Comments and actions - seemed to miss the mark. Basically, your self esteem just wasn't feeling solid on that particular day!

Sometimes I assume that people will see and know my heart and soul. Oh, how I wish they could see into me at times! To know and understand my motives or intent. But, they don't. And no matter how long I'm alive, I will probably always be astonished that people in my life will continue to misunderstand or second-guess me.

So, yes - today was one of those days for me. I felt like a dork. I just wasn't able to quite "connect" with a few people, and my feelings got bruised up a bit. I shouldn't be surprised, actually. I had a few other encouraging things happen this past week and I should have had my armor on and been ready for Satan to hit in retaliation. But, I wasn't. And oh, how Satan loves to get us where it's personal - doesn't he?

How thankful I am, that I can come to God - just as I am. No pressure to perform to certain standards or expectations, no misunderstandings (for He can not only see my heart - He can read my mind!) - and nothing but open arms welcoming me into His presence - wanting to see me, be with me, and love me. How reassuring and thankful I am! Because this evening, I need those open arms. I need His love to remind me that I am not a dork. I need His strength to build me up again and show me that I'm doing okay and I'm on the right track - regardless of responses by others. He can encourage me to stay the course. Because Satan loves to make us feel sorry for ourselves and powerless - doesn't He? We can't be used to spread God's love and cheer if we're too busy being wrapped up in our own pity party. I know that, and I see that.

It was just a day. One day. And not all days are going to be beautiful, lovely, charming, and lovey. I know that. Tomorrow morning, the sun will rise and I can start fresh.

My soul is comforted by being able to take my feelings of "dorkiness" to the Lord. He is always there for me - ready, waiting, and welcoming.

For God said,

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Cor. 12:9-10

Or - as in my translation -
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in (dorkiness). Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my (dorkiness) so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake - I delight in (dorkiness), in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am (feeling like a dork), then I am strong."

I don't have to be perfect. I just need to come as I am.

When You're Not Enough

Dionna Sanchez — 2009-04-07T14:12:23 -05.00

Have you ever felt like you're not enough? I'm sure you have. You know, that feeling that you can't give enough or "be" enough for everyone else. If you get everything done - then you get the impression that others feel you are an overachiever and too busy in life; they feel you need to relax and slow down. If you let things go and simply enjoy the fun things for awhile, you are a slacker. If you feel you are being humble, others act as if you are weak and need to learn how to be independent and strong. If you engage in your strong side and try to be a warrior for God - then you are made to feel as if you should have more compassion in your heart instead.

I don't know why life seems to be like this sometimes. But it does. I know that I, on many occasions, have felt like I could never be enough for someone else - that I would never quite say the right thing unless I conformed to what their image of me was to be. That I wouldn't be able to do enough, say enough, or show enough to appease their standards of me - unless I actually DID meet their standards of me! That's a hard row to hoe.

It's hard because we can easily feel like giving up and not bothering at all. Which is exactly what Satan wants us to do.

As I am contemplating all of this, it occurs to me how prideful we can all be trying to "be enough." Because when we try to be enough - it is really for ourselves and not for someone else. We seem to get it in our heads that we need to achieve some level of "success" in our own hearts and minds to consider ourselves worthy to be loved or to have an attitude of self-importance. But if I look at it in a different light, instead of from a prideful heart that needs to feel validated - I see that God can work more in my life when I'm not enough. That is when I seek Him and reach out to Him and grow as a believer. I will never be enough - because only my God is enough. I try to be enough for me. To live up to an image I have projected for myself.

When others make us feel like we aren't enough for them - that we aren't being or acting the way they want us to at the moment.... we shouldn't just disregard it, yet at the same time we need to really take a look at our feelings and evaluate if it is them that is really projecting a feeling onto us - or us projecting feelings onto ourselves because of guilt, ambition, feelings of inadequacy, or more. And realize that Satan loves it when we feel inadequate and defeated.

I would feel far freer and more whole, if I stopped trying to be enough for everyone else and started KNOWING that I am enough for God. We are enough for God even though we can never measure up TO God.

Sometimes being enough is realizing that we will never be as much of something or someone as we'd prefer. We will always fall short. We will always stumble. We will always struggle with our pride and our selfishness. We will always be inadequate compared to the glory of the Lord. And yet God expects no more of us than to simply come to Him as we are.

How humbling and truly liberating to realize that a perfect God accepts and loves me - flaws, mistakes, and all. And all I need to be is who He created me to be. It may not be good enough for someone else....but it's all He wants from me. And it should be all I want... and expect.. from myself.

Harmful Friendships

Dionna Sanchez — 2009-02-16T18:08:38 -05.00

Friendships. They are so vital. Once you get married and have children, it can be tougher to make new friends and maintain old friendships. Still, they are very important to our emotional and spiritual well-being.

I have come to learn that there is another aspect of friendships that is just as important and needs to be brought to people's attention. That is the aspect of outgrowing a friendship or learning that a friendship is not healthy for you. And this can be a tough thing to come to terms with.... Especially if you are lonely or longing for friends.

Friendships have an amazing source of strength and influence in our lives and that is why it is so important to make wise choices in who we allow into our inner circle. It's better to have one or two close friends who you can trust, instead of a larger circle of friends who are a detriment to you.

Bad friendships are those that bring you down or hold you back in one way or another. Maybe they are very negative and so you find yourself starting to become negative. Maybe they have a bad habit that you find yourself starting to participate in or they don't have the same boundaries on their life that you desire to have and so it becomes increasingly difficult for you to keep those fences and priorities up. Whatever it is, it is important to be aware of these things and reevaluate the influence people have on you and your family.

We rub shoulders with others in such a way that what goes on in their life starts to go on in our own lives. You can minister to someone and help them without bringing them in and having them become an intimate friend with you. There is a difference. Our friends need to inspire us to be better, stronger, and healthier people. So if we can find people who are one step ahead of us, instead of dragging us down, they will pull us up!

Take a good look at who you allow into your life and why. Remind yourself that not everyone has the right, or deserves to be let into your most private thoughts or moments. Not everyone benefits you. God says that "everything may be permissible but not everything is beneficial." That is a good gage for us as we evaluate our friendships. We can be friendly and kind to others without becoming their best friend and closest confidante. And if we are longing for close relationships, we can pray about them knowing that God desires for us to be surrounded with good people too.

It's better to wait for that friendship that makes our life richer and more meaningful than to settle for a relationship that ultimately harms our family and life in some way and causes us to take a step backward in who we are.

You are important. Your family is special and important. Don't you deserve the very best in friends as well?

Make the steps today to filter out those friendships that have caused unhealthy or negative patterns to creep into your life and start praying and seeking out those who pull you up. It may not be easy to do .... But it will be worth it.

Let Your Mind Empty

Dionna Sanchez — 2009-01-28T11:51:52 -05.00

Do you ever have a tough time falling asleep - and yet you KNOW you are tired?? How about struggling to pay attention to the sermon on Sunday or forgetting where you put your car keys? I've asked people in my family where something is and it's been sitting right in front of me!

Our minds are so full. They contain so much information that they are always in a spin cycle. And to top all of that off, we have a lot of extra noise that fills them up too... maybe it's the television on in the background, music, or electronic noise such as the Internet, Wii, or Nintendo.

I like to walk our treadmill while reading a book or watching a movie. I'm lucky. We have it set up so that I can do this. It helps me stay on the treadmill longer. But today I decided to just walk. JUST walk.

I found myself thinking about all sorts of things. My mind flitted to this and wandered to that. I prayed and hymns came to my mind. It was delightful. It was delightful because as I walked I felt my mind empty. And I realized how much that was needed.

Our heads need a break sometimes. They need a fresh start. They don't need more junk piled into them all of the time. They need to be cleared out. And if you're anything like me, that gets done far too little. It's like we have to have something to do, think about, or pour into ourselves all of the time. I mean, you see people walking down the street with their IPODs plugged in, people are texting at the fast food restaurant table, and kids bring little PSP's or Nintendo DS's with them when visiting a friend's house. It's TOO much.

How about just taking a walk. No noise. No music. No cell phone. How about just eating lunch? Or just sitting down in the doctor's office and waiting without a magazine to fill up your mind?

Let you mind empty. Let it ponder, let it think through, let it flit and flutter - let it.

And just maybe instead of being bored, you will find yourself relaxed, refreshed, thought out and calm. Maybe, just maybe... you'll be able to fall asleep tonight because all of those thoughts are already poured out.

Maybe.

The Beauty That Comes With Wrinkles

Dionna Sanchez — 2009-01-21T11:24:38 -05.00

It is simply amazing to me how the older I get, the younger that age becomes when I used to think it was so old! Maybe it's maturity or the realization that I can still have fun and do a lot of things I want to do. Maybe it's denial. Either way - I appreciate my age and simply being alive.

I am trying to take care of myself the best I can. My best right now is simply trying to find the time to apply lotion to dry skin in between taking care of my family! In a year or so, my best might be getting more sleep in addition to putting on lotion!! I think it depends on the season of your life.

I am amazed at how society is transfixed upon youth. Youth is great. It is carefree, fearless, energetic, and fun. But there is something that comes with growing up that is stirring also. A mature woman has wisdom, contentment and meaning that you can only learn through experiencing life.

I remember hearing about a time when older people were cherished. They were looked upon as wise leaders and counselors. In some tribes that is still the case. What happened? Why does it seem like older people are now laughed upon or shoved out of the way? I, personally, grew up around older citizens and was advised at an early age to listen to them and learn from their mistakes and experiences in life. I heeded that advice and am thankful for it. There is much to be learned from those who have traveled ahead of us!! So much wisdom can be sought there and it can be wasted if we are not careful.

I want to teach my children to not only be kind to the elderly, but to respect them. They are not deaf, dumb, or crippled simply because age has taken hold of their bodies. They are human beings who still feel, love, hurt, and have desires; maybe even unanswered dreams! They are the monarchy of our heritage.

All generations and phases of life should be appreciated. Youth is a wonderful learning time. It can be very contagious to be around the energy of teens. It can also be thought provoking to be around the older and more mature people in our world. Those wrinkles come with a rich story behind each line. Aaahh - the blessings to be able to live a long life!! That is what we should think of. Not the wasted expense and time trying to relive the past of our youth.

I think people are beautiful for who they are. Young and old exhibit a different and unique kind of beauty. Each one stunning in its own way.

Don't let society trap you into thinking you can only be loved if you have soft skin and perfect posture. It is well to teach your children this also. You will be so thankful you did when it is your turn to be the wise tribal leader of your family.

Forgiving Yourself

Dionna Sanchez — 2008-12-19T10:51:35 -05.00

I can be pretty hard on myself. I'm usually harder on myself than other people are on me. It's because I have high expectations. I expect a lot out of myself. It's funny - I tell other people to give themselves a break and to go easy on themselves; that's also a lesson I'm trying to teach myself.

When I make mistakes, I'm learning that it's important to forgive myself. Sometimes I can hold onto those mistakes and just make myself feel like a miserable failure. That's not good. Instead I am trying to learn that I need to give myself some grace and mercy sometimes as well as giving it to others.

It is OK to make mistakes. As long as you learn and grow from them. We need to learn to trust ourselves, honor ourselves, and treat ourselves with respect when we mess up. Because we WILL mess up. It's like we get it in our head that we won't. Then when we do, we come down really hard on ourselves or try to deny that we made a mistake.

I think if we can be open and positive about where we messed up, the healing can come quicker to our hearts. A humble heart is a heart that can hold great compassion for others when they make their own mistakes along life's journey. We all mess up. We all need encouragement and support when we do. We just need to remind each other (and especially ourselves) that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. We need to make that choice to forgive ourselves for simply being human.

The Power of Touch

Dionna Sanchez — 2008-12-13T12:09:58 -05.00

I love it when someone hugs me. There is just something about it that lifts my mood and spirits. A hug doesn't solve any problems but it just helps somehow.

Recently, I decided that I was going to try to touch people more. By "touch" I mean, hug, squeeze, pat, etc. I decided to do this because I wanted to see if by just simply touching someone, that could affect a relationship or draw someone closer to you who otherwise might have kept themselves a little more removed.

I'm in the early stages of my experiment, but so far, I think it's working. At least it's working on me! I experience warmer feelings in my heart towards others when I touch them. I seem to be able to give them more grace and mercy to make mistakes and I'm less judgmental when I allow myself to draw close to them and reach out to them with my hands - which actually causes me to reach out to them with my heart. I've just been feeling like I want closer friendships in my life and I figured instead of waiting for others to come to me, I would start reaching out to them a little bit more.

Princess Diana was widely known to touch people. She would reach out her hand and place it on a shoulder, a knee, or a face. It was why people felt so endeared towards her. They didn't just feel like a nameless face, but someone whom she gave her attention to and someone whom she let her heart truly be with, if only for a moment.

I want to be that kind of a person. Someone who can let their heart "engage" and reach out to someone who might need to know that someone truly cares for them. It's amazing what a squeeze on the arm or a pat on the back can do for someone who feels truly alone and forgotten. A small but meaningful hug can really bridge the gap when someone just longs for a friend or a caring heart in their life.

I have felt the power of touch in my own life. It has healed my heart, softened my heart, prodded my heart, and accepted my heart on so many different occasions by so many different people. Now I'm ready to give back. I'm ready to see the power of touch transform someone else's life.

We live in a world that is getting increasingly busy and unattached from personal relationships. People are turning to the Internet to communicate and the personal dynamic in relationships and friendships can be lost; creating lonely, lost lives. If we can only remind people that they are not alone, that someone does care, and that they are loved - what a difference that could make!

I hope that my experiment never ends but instead, becomes a habit and a part of my life. I hope that I can start instinctively reaching out to hug someone without even thinking about it, as a way to show them they matter. After all, we all need to hear that. And we all need to feel it.

Restoration

Dionna Sanchez — 2008-11-10T09:27:33 -05.00

Do-overs. How many times do you wish you could go back in the past and do something "over?" We all do. We all make mistakes or have things happen to us that profoundly impacted our lives and the way we see and feel about life. We can be affected by those moments and circumstances forever. But, how will we let them affect us is a much deeper question than simply acknowledging that they will, indeed, affect us.

Sometimes we let those past hurts or sins to disable where we are today. We don't leave them behind in the past, where they belong. Instead we wear them with us - every moment - every second of our lives. We live and breathe them. But when we do that, we have let Satan cripple us. He uses something so personal to us that God could use for a ministry in our lives; and instead, he cripples our ability to heal and be made whole. He cripples our ability to be used by the Lord.

God can provide positive outlets of ministry in our lives from those very pains and sorrows from our past. Instead of simply being "affected" we can instead be "effective.' It's kind of like the saying - "turning lemons into lemonade." We can use what we did or what happened to us and turn it around for the good of others and for the Glory of the Lord.

God can restore us - but we have to let Him. That means walking through those minefields of hurts and heartaches. It might even mean unveiling them and bringing them out into the open where other people will hear and know about them. But I have found that God has an amazing way of making something that we think is so dark and ugly, appear so merciful and tender when it's brought into the light of His forgiveness and grace. It's scary getting to that point but He will walk us through it step by step and we WILL make it.

We each have a chance to have a "do-over." We have the chance to respond to that "thing" that hurts our heart so deeply. That time is today. The time is now to make the choice to not just be "affected" but to be "effective." Don't let Satan make you a victim any longer. It's time to be restored.